I’ve always been what you’d call an expert on the human expression, a creative genius, if you will – not that I’ve ever been one to blow my own trumpet.
You know the kind of lady who makes pretty tame mistakes, but then crucifies herself for them? Well, that’s me.
What’s your number? The double entendre I fear the most.
Here’s hoping that one day their innocent love will break down the institutions that bind them.
At first I thought she might have been on her period but quickly realised what had actually happened – my fabled banjo string had snapped!
The title is where the problems start. … 13 Reasons not to…
Fake tits, fake tan, lacey lingerie and glitter spray. The list goes on. But how much does it really cost to get other people off?
Losing your virginity. A truly grand and firework-worthy moment that will change your life forever. Time to cut the shit, it’s not.
Sparking hope in the eyes of thousands of pizza delivery drivers everywhere, who wistfully dream that one day they’ll get ‘just the tip’ instead of… just the tip.