Words by: Parisa Sarmady 
Art by: Julia Park

The suburban dream: the two-story house, decent nine-to-five job, two kids running around, sporty car parked outside, completed by the picture-perfect white picket fence. Essentially, the happily ever after…right? Or at least I thought so.

Thinking about the future has always stirred an uneasy pit in my stomach. When I was younger, it had more to do with the fact that I couldn’t picture a cookie-cutter image of what my life should look like. Now, it has more to do with the fear that my ideal future is somehow wrong and selfish, especially as a woman. 

To tell the truth, I’ve never liked the idea of settling down. To me, it implicitly translates into starting a family, which is something I’ve never desired. I don’t have any plans on becoming a mother and having kids in the future, as it’s not something I’ve ever wanted for myself. This has always made me feel wrong in a sense. 

But then again, when you’re constantly shown a version of what your life should look like, reinforced by the media you consume and the people around you, it’s hard not to feel a certain pressure to pursue the same path, or risk being seen as falling behind. 

I used to struggle with justifying myself to people because I would usually be met with responses like, “Well, you can’t be so sure, you’re so young.” But then I realised, why do I have to explain myself? I’m not broken for wanting something a little different. At the end of the day, it’s my life, not theirs. I’m the one that has to live it, not them. Thus, it’s my decision to make. Simple. 

In the famous words of basketball legend Michael Jordan, “Fuck them kids.”

As I’m entering my early twenties, most conversations, without fail, tend to include my favourite question ever: Where do you see yourself in the future? (Absolutely criminal question, in my opinion, should be abolished.) While I still don’t love the question, I have a better picture of what I aspire for my future to look like. One that doesn’t fit what society has deemed right for women. 

I still want the white picket fence life but perhaps a more tailored version of it (though the two-story house would be nice in this economy). Personally, I’m okay with bypassing a few traditional milestones, as long as I feel content, happy and comfortable, ultimately, that’s all that matters in the end. 

That’s what I hope my happily ever after looks like and no, it doesn’t include diaper changes and school drop-offs.