Words by:  Anthea Bernabe Witoelar 
Art by:  Kenneth Toh

Growing up, I always felt my friends knew more about their ancestors than I did. They had more stories and experiences to tell and knew more about their history. But if there was one thing the younger me had, it was being extremely nosy.

My maternal grandfather and paternal grandmother passed away before I was born. Only through the grapevine was I able to learn about them. My mum was very open about the stories of my grandfather: how he loved cars, loved to travel, was intelligent and that I had the same sleeping face as him. My father, on the other hand, always seemed more closed off about his mother, but the truth was, I never asked too many questions either.

When my paternal grandfather passed away in 2021, it struck me that the stories on that side of the family would be lost if I did not start asking questions quickly. So, like any other 16-year-old, I annoyed my father and tried to learn as much as I could about my Abuela.

Maria Luisa Navarro Meseguer. 

She was born in 1944 in Villarreal de los Infantes, Valencia, eight years after the Franco dictatorship began. She was a woman placed into many hardships from the beginning of her life. 

My Abuela did everything she could to challenge the system. She studied medicine at university and later became an Obstetrician-Gynaecologist (OBGYN). While working for the Spanish Social Security, she opened her practice in town. She owned and ran the clinic from the early 1970s to the late 1980s while caring for two children: my uncle and father. She and my Abuelo divorced 11 years after my father was born.

Divorce was only legalised in 1981 after the regime fell. 

She was one of the first people to get divorced in Spain.

As her practice grew, so did her desire to learn more about helping the people around her. She began learning about mindfulness and sofrology. Mindfulness was just entering the Western world and becoming a more acceptable practice, and she was determined to encourage whoever she could to practice it. 

By the time she started practising mindfulness, Sofrology was being adapted. Sofrology is a relaxation method that combines physical and mental exercises to promote health and well-being. She tried to teach as many people as she could. She taught the Spanish national water polo team and professional cyclists, and, as both an OBGYN and a mother, wanted to help other women. 

Birth control was also just coming into the market during the 60s. Although illegal during the regime, my Abuela provided it to her clients when she thought it was best. She put her life on the line trying to help other women.

She was an advocate for equality and women’s rights. She did what she could to help those around her — whether it was the pregnant women coming to her for advice, women seeking out birth control, or her own kids asking for homework help. She did it all.

My Abuela lost her life in 1992 due to uterine cancer. She was 48 years old.

She was a strong opponent of the regime and everything it stood for. Her existence was inherently political. While she may not have publicly defied Franco, her actions reflect her inclusive and aspiring nature to welcome everyone.

Throughout her life, she tried to help as many people as she could: her clients, her family and her community, no matter the potential costs. 

I may have never met her, but I know the people she left behind. I see the imprint she left on my father. 

Every day, I try to be as defiant as my Abuela because if there’s one thing I know, she’s who I want to be when I grow up.