Words by: Angel Tully
Art by: Jess Heng

I’m not looking for a man in finance with a trust fund who’s 6’5 with blue eyes — sue me.

I know some people may argue that there’s nothing sexier than a corporate slave who dresses himself with Daddy’s money, but I’ve got my eyes on a different prize.

As a business student myself, I don’t need help understanding big words like “taxes”, “GDP”, or “inflation”. And I’d rather not be dating someone who feels the need to mansplain those things to me (I’m talking to you, finance bros). But what I do want help with is something of a completely different ballgame.

I want someone who can help me build my apartment furniture and install fancy rainbow smart lights in my living room. Or who has all the power tools in the world and isn’t afraid to use them; someone that can get it going with a chainsaw and deliver me some good wood to get my fire going. There’s just something so hot about a man who can fix things, build things and lift things — especially when you get to watch them flex their sweaty muscles while they do it. That very hands-on someone, you might have guessed, is often seen sporting some hi-vis, FXD work pants and some steel-capped boots.

I’m talking about tradies. Or perhaps not all tradies, but my tradie.

He comes home sporting the classic tradie uniform, with those classic FXD pants. I’ve come to affectionately refer to these as ‘sexy fireman pants’, even though he is in fact, an electrician. A sparky if you will… and boy, does he light a spark in me. Something about the pants and no shirt combo when he’s getting dressed is very Magic Mike-esque, it’s very fireman-on-a-calendar vibes in my humble opinion. They sit at the perfect height on the waist to tease a bit of that stomach V, and they’re the perfect amount dirty and beaten up that they scream tough and sexy.

Now of course I would never date someone because of their profession, and it is certainly not the reason we are together now. The truth is, it was only once we started dating that began to realise, and make use of, all the perks of being a tradie’s girlfriend. All that is to say, he’s pretty nice to look at, with or without his work clothes on, and I’m officially a sucker for a steel-capped boot.

I mean, who can resist someone in uniform? Who knows… maybe your jam is the shirt and puffer vest combo regularly spotted hopping on the train at Toorak station before the 9-5 grind. Or maybe it’s the police officer who — unfortunately — doesn’t get to bring their handcuffs home. Perhaps it’s the head honcho in a white coat and a stethoscope around their neck that you gazed at dreamily when they said “Call me Dr”.

To all the sexy people in uniform in the world, we see you, we’ve gawked at you, we’ve thought about you on our ride home. You’re a pillar of our community, working to make it a better place, both in the profession you chose and the cute clothes you wear while doing it. So please, from our wardrobes to yours, please don’t take the uniform off until we’re there to see you do it.