Words by: Simonnette Labiran
Art by: Sakshi Ahuja

Australia is made up of a range of cultures, all united by their desire to love.

So many people from different ethnic backgrounds fall in love and don’t necessarily share the same native language. How did they make it work… if at all? Can the language of love override linguistic barriers?

I explored these questions with two people—both in multilingual relationships. Anja’s native language is Norwegian and she moved here from Norway in 2022 for university. Pamela moved from Mexico to Australia at a young age, and her native language is Latin American Spanish.

When, where, or how did you meet your long-term or potential partner?

A: We met over Tinder and he was keen to get off the app so he gave me his number. On our first date, we met up at Caulfield Park and instantly clicked.

P: We first met in high school because we were in the same class. We both had a little crush on each other for the next few years but we were too shy to act on it. Then one day during my first year, he invited me to see him at Melbourne Uni and asked me to be his girlfriend.

Did you feel any cultural differences or find it hard to communicate?

A: I don’t find Australians and Norwegians to be too different… but what first stood out to me was his strong Aussie accent and his deep voice. Especially in the beginning when I first came here, I couldn’t understand his accent or the slang associated with Australian culture.

P: A little bit. I’ve been very lucky that my partner has a pretty open and relaxed relationship with his parents about his dating habits. But with my parents, I still have to ask for their permission for everything and they have to know exactly where I am. Another difference is that in Mexico, we have a lot of intimate physical touch, even if you’re just friends. We all kiss each other on the cheek when we’re greeting each other, but he’s very reserved and I’ve found that to be true with all Australians.

How do you try to express yourself without speaking?

A: Both of our love languages are very physical. So even though we had some language barriers, we still managed to communicate our love through touch. My other love language is gift-giving, while he loves spending quality time with me. Because we value these other love languages, we don’t have to rely on words to show our love.

P: Kindness is one of his biggest love languages. He loves it when I leave him little notes or send him nice text messages.

Despite the cultural and linguistic differences, do you feel love can overcome them?

A: There are a lot of things that come up that we have opposite opinions about. We agree to disagree and respect each other’s views. We love each other so much that our differences, instead of pushing us apart, are just another way for us to connect.

P: I think it did. I’m very fluent in English so it isn’t too hard for us to communicate. But he started learning Spanish so he could communicate with my grandparents. It did take him about a year, but he can hold a conversation with them now and my grandma loves him.

Do you have any advice for others?

A: To learn each other’s languages and pay attention to how your partner expresses themself. P: Just give it your best and keep talking to your partner about what’s difficult for you. Teach them about your culture and be open to learning more about their culture as well.

P: Just give it your best and keep talking to your partner about what’s difficult for you. Teach them about your culture and be open to learning more about their culture as well.